My Experiences - Yep, My Life Is A Bit Of A Mess...Oh Well

The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is the problem. - Theodore Rubin

mmmmm....coffee is NEVER a problem!

Yep! My love of quotes is back on my blog! :) I really like that quote, not because I need it for myself, but because I have had some run-ins with people who were frustrated with my problematic life.

Where do I begin...

I am in a transition period in my life. It is not a pleasant one and it has been a struggle for me. I have way more bad days than good for a long while now. This has been hard on the people in my life. I do not hide my feelings well and that is just who I am. I have improved, but I will probably never change 100%. I have discovered who I can snot cry with, who I can emotionally vomit on, and who I can be grumpy and bitter around.

Just a random meme I like :)

This leaves everyone else:
The people who can only handle me at my best. The people who need me to be their sunshine. I still care about these people. I still want to have these people in my life. At first, I get mad at these people especially when they come around me and then proceed to pick on me because I am having a bad day. I want to just tell them, "if you do not like who I am today, then go the fuck away." But I don't. Instead I just try to fake cheer up to make them feel better.

Fake Cheery Me....adorbs huh?

I have, however, learned to not get hurt by the people who just stay away either; because they know I am having a bad day or I tell them up front. That is a new skill I have acquired. This skill is absolutely amazing. The ability to realize that sometimes the other person just is not capable of dealing with the negatives in your life, is truly freeing. The ability to accept that when someone doesn't like who you have become is their issue and not yours. Its okay to not be liked and accepted by everyone, to include people who used to like and accept you.

Another random fave meme

Back to those people in my life that put up with my crazy right now. The ones I allow to see how I truly am 24/7. The good, the bad and the ugly. These people are special and I am absolutely grateful for them. These are the people who let me be me and in the process my frown usually turns upside down. They bring the joy back into my life. They are the awesome in my life!

Comments

Will You Be My Friend?

Why is it so hard to make friends? Humans need social connections to survive and thrive. I feel that developing friendships gets harder as we get older, but then wonder if it slopes back down after a certain age. Since moving to Texas, I have met many wonderful people that I believe had good intentions to grow a friendship with me. I have been here for nine months and feel disconnected. The other day, I was sharing how I was feeling with a new person in my life. She expressed she had been experiencing the same thing. That conversation inspired this post. As a child, I did struggle to make friends, but not like how I do now. I kind of just picked someone that liked the same things as me and then would be friends for however long. I have noticed that as people get older, like golden years older, they start to lack f***s. By then I think I might be like "either you like me or you don't." I have shared in previous posts why friendship is distinctly challenging for me...

Twenty-Nineteen, My Year of Courage

... Courage is the word I picked to live by in 2019 Image by 1778011 from Pixabay How did I show courage this year? I moved to Texas without a solid plan. I decided that it was time to see what was on the other side of fear. Leaving the comfort and security of Florida was scary. Moving away from my Florida family, not knowing how to have long distance friendships was scary. Relocating on my own, without the military, without a guarantee, was friggin' scary. I challenged myself to do uncomfortable things. I have a strong distaste for social engagements that are not themed purposeful parties. That has not changed. But, I knew it was a necessary evil and ventured out to networking events. I crashed a few times, but quickly developed a great strategy. Now, I am somewhat considered an expert on the topic, at least for those that avoid social engagements also. I faced being fired square in the face and stood tall. I do not shy away from my being fired. I don't e...

Seriously People, Stop With The "Sonar Ping!"

I would like to quickly share how I feel about the phenomenon I call the Sonar Ping text message. This is when someone texts you a "Hey," "Hello," "Sup," [hand wave], etc. You send a quick response back and then you do not hear from them again until much time has passed. I can only guess as to why people do this. Maybe, they want to make sure you are still available to them-when and if they actually want to make time for you. Or possibly, they want to make sure you are alive-feeling guilty about ignoring you. Or perhaps, they genuinely wanted to connect with you but, something is preventing them from completing that chain. Usually this type of behavior does not bother me, but right now it bugs the f**** outta me. You see, I am desperately craving connection and attention. I miss my friends in Florida so very much. I miss my face to face interactions with them. These days, I am alone a lot. Texting is just not quite cutting it anymore. Texting from cer...

I'm Mfing Awesome, Yo!

Search This Blog